Discussion with Farnese

Our ambassador confides in the subject of the international day of transgender visibility.

Before reading this interview, if you are not familiar with the vocabulary of the genre, I recommend the little glossary at the end of the article. 

I already told you about Farnese in the previous article from this blog PlaisirsDurables. After women's rights, this international day is dedicated to transgender visibility.  

One like the other should not exist, we agree. That said, no confusion with Valentine's Day or Mother's Day, which should not exist under the pretext of taking care of the loved one all year round. We are not talking about a marketing operation or rainbow-washing. If this day should not exist, it is simply because there is a fight to be fought when we would have done well without it. It is therefore not a day that we need but a constant education of society.  

It is in this perspective that Eric, founder of PlaisirsDurables, has chosen a trans muse for its brand. This choice offers a place involved in several causes to a person from various minorities. This visibility wants to show another reality, different from the stereotypes put on show by the mainstream media with shows with large audiences. Also, our eclectic team allows PlaisirsDurables to evolve with a global vision representative of the people who make up our society, rich in our differences. In context, here is a summary of my interview with Farnese

As a trans woman, what does this day mean to you? 

Farnese: The day, even the trans visibility week, is my daily life. This day is important for cisgender people who are not informed enough. We need to educate society to be aware, to be aware of our reality to better accept ourselves. 

Each person, each story is unique. Can you briefly share yours with us? 

Farnese: I am now 20 years old. During my childhood, adolescence, I always liked makeup, fashion and other “girls” accessories. (Farnese really emphasizes the quotes in her hands). I was the gay in the class and pretty ok with it, unlike my parents. They rejected me 2 years ago, so I found refuge with my best friend. It was then that I understood my wish to be a woman and began my transition.  

You found refuge with your friend, but why not via an association? 

Farnese: In Belgium, it's not that simple. I went to an association for minors in difficulty (financial, dropping out of school, LGBTQIA+, …) but the help offered was purely logistical and it did not always go well. I come from Ostend where people are quite closed on this subject, that's why I went to Ghent. The Rainbow Houses are quite active but I managed to find a room to settle in. 

What is the biggest difficulty you encounter? 

Farnese: Waiting! The transition takes a lot of time and patience. It started during the lockdown period. As a result, during this covid crisis, isolation had a beneficial side to assume my changes, day after day. I am a woman but still today with a deep voice so it is complicated to enter a “woman” fitting room. We would like everything to go quickly but we have to wait to get a paper. You have to wait for an appointment. You have to wait to have hormone treatment. You have to wait to see some changes. Expect.  

And from an administrative point of view, is it not complicated? 

Farnese: No, it was quite simple. I went to the municipality to make this change on my identity papers. It only costs the usual price of editing the documents. 

Currently, it is not yet possible to choose a non-binary gender or genderfluid X on your papers, what do you think? 

Farnese: Indeed, I really wonder why it is so complicated and why it takes so long. The draft modification of the Belgian law has been in progress since 2019 but still has not been applied. Personally, it is important to tick the F to mark the purpose of my approach. Even if I had the chance, I wouldn't choose the X. 

Marie: in fact, I'm not asked for my opinion, but a little parenthesis to give it anyway... in the end, why is it important that the genre appears visibly, or not for that matter, on a document of identity? That's another discussion ;-) 

Several personalities are publicized, voluntarily or not, about their transition. Eliott Page for the most militant or closer, our Deputy Prime Minister, Petra De Sutter. Is it important to have examples?  

Farnese: Personally, I ran out of models already because of my skin color. Even if we are shown the success of Beyoncé or Will Smith, we keep in mind this stereotype of white superiority. It's very difficult. It was only very late that I was able to discover black queer artists and that feels good, of course. On the other hand, it is tiring to hear each time a person qualified as trans. We should talk about a person for what they do, for who they are and not for their gender. 

So, I promise, the next time I talk about you, Farnese, it will only be to praise your qualities as a SustainablePleasures ambassador. Thank you for this moment of sharing.

See the video Presentation PlaisirsDurables by Farnese
Follow Farnese on his Instagram page


A little lexicon of the genre...  

Agency >  A person who does not identify with any gender. She considers herself gender-neutral or gender-neutral. 

Cisgenre  A person whose gender identity matches the sex assigned to them at birth based on biological characteristics.  

gender dysphoria > A state characterized by a persistent feeling of discomfort or distress caused by a mismatch between gender identity and sex assigned at birth. 

Genderfluid > A person whose gender identity is changing, who can change from masculine to feminine or gender neutral. 

Gender identity > It refers to the intimate and personal experience of gender, concerning being a man, a woman, between woman and man, both, or not recognizing oneself in the gender man or woman, regardless of the assigned sex. at birth. 

Non-binary > This term designates a person whose gender identity does not fit into the binary norm, that is to say who does not identify with either the category of man or that of woman.  

Trans > A person whose gender identity or feelings do not match the sex assigned to them at birth. Trans is an umbrella term that notably includes transgender people or transsexual people.  

Transition > Transition is a non-linear process during which a person can take legal, social or medical steps to better reflect their gender identity. It can range from changing your name to changing your appearance, taking hormones or having gender confirmation surgery. 

Source : illustre.ch 


Je m’appelle Marie. Je ne suis ni journaliste, ni sexologue mais simplement bavarde et curieuse. C’est donc sans aucune prétention que je partagerai ici avec vous quelques articles, tantôt utiles, tantôt futiles mais toujours spontanés et libérés.

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